The Warubozu Usagi

11:57 pm

Off planet, in orbit around Ukio to avoid having to pay for parking

After watching the sunrise on Ukio, the crew of the Black Flea returns to space. Wu-chan, checking in with the Ulishia Gateway Authority, is wrong and there is a long line to gate out of the Ulishia system.

WU: Well, them's the breaks, yeah?

S: (sarcastically) Oh wow, who would have guessed?

RP: (raised eyebrow) I dunno, Cap. This feels more like user error.

WU: (feigning shock) Et tu, Brute? ... Tomorrow afternoon at the earliest. I say we make it tomorrow night sometime after dinner. You guys wanna have dinner in Tatamo? I know of an awesome ramen shop down there!

RP: Sounds good.

SM: Yeah sure.

Meri: Wuf!

S: (heavy sigh) ...fine.

WU: Yas! Done and done! What now?

S: Ooh. We still haven't gone over the plan to get into Jageda Industries and...

WU: (rolling eyes back into skull) BORING.

S: You'd rather get caught or die, do you?

WU: Syvil, we have soooooooo much time to do that.

S: (squinting at Wu-chan) Do we?

WU: Yeah! Look, we'll do it tomorrow afternoon before we head out for ramen. How 'bout that?

S: Fine.

WU: In the meantime...oh, I know! Who wants to binge watch the last season of The Walking Dead?!?

RP: That show is still going? What season are they on?

SM: 82? 83?

WU: Last season was 79. The show went on hiatus a couple of times but they keep finding ways to milk that story for every last drop of blood. This upcoming year is rumored to be the last, though!

RP: Count me out. I'm going to work on the fusion drives to up their output. Shoko, wanna join?

SM: ...

RP: I'll help you out with improving your quantum-time messaging computer.

SM: Deal.

S: I can help, too.

SM: Mmm, I don't think so, Syvil. Red's a better fit for the job.

(walking away with Red, Shoko side winks at Syvil)

S: Hey Meri, how about you let me work on your shell to...

WU: Syvil, you're hanging out with me. No work today for you. I mean, please hang out with me to binge The Walking Dead. Meri, you're joining us, too.

Meri: (looks at Syvil) Wuf?

S: (intrigued) Hmm. Okay sure.

(Wu-chan rushes off and three minutes later he reappears with a bowl of popcorn and a pair of Diet Half-Caf Kong Kola and the three of them plop down on the sofa to watch The Walking Dead, S79)

S: Ah geez. There's so much blood.

WU: I know. Amazing!

S: That's so twisted. How can a whole planet keep spawning zombies like that? Wait. Are we watching this because our next hop is to the Haunaloa system?

WU: What? No. Pure coincidence.

S: OH. MY. GAWD. You want to go down to Zed, don't you?

WU: Wow! Can you read my mind?

S: (face palm) Warui! We are not flying down to a zombie-classified planet.

WU: Aren't you curious?

S: Warui, there are no zombies. It's either a deadly, contagious viral outbreak planet or it's some secret government project.

(blood splattering on everyone in a scene reminiscent of Carrie at prom)

WU: (eyes bulging) Let's go check it out!

Meri: Wuuuuf.

S: No.

WU: We'll land, stare out the window for a bit, then leave.

S: (hit the intercom) Warui wants to land on Zed to look for zombies.

SM + RP: (over intercom) NO.

WU: Fine...fly by? We'll never come close to the ground. We'll just fly through and see if we can spot anything from the air. Totally safe!

S: Fine.

WU: You're not scared by zombies, are you?

S: What? No. I told you they're fake.

(on screen, zombies tear apart a robotic shell to eat the brains of a Hafu while she screams)

WU: Cool, cool.

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

11:57 pm

Late afternoon onboard the Black Flea in orbit around Ukio

Wu-chan and Red are playing VR games again when a disheveled Syvil appears in the “living room”. She's just woken up after having trouble falling asleep after watching through E3 S79 of The Walking Dead with Wu-chan.

S: Why didn't anyone wake me up? I can't believe my alarm didn't go off, and it's almost time for dinner!

WU: (takes VR visor off and looks back at Syvil) Yeah, you looked tired so I turned the alarm off.

S: (not amused) Warui!

WU: Ehh, don't worry, we have lots of time to go over the plans. You just looked really tired and the health of the crew is very important to me.

S: (frustrated, walks off) I'm taking a shower before we head down for dinner.

WU: (puts VR visor back on) K. We'll be here.

(30 minutes have passed and Shoko has joined Red and Wu-chan in playing VR games when Syvil returns)

S: WHO REPLACED MY CONDITIONER?!?

(Wu-chan, Red, and Shoko take off their visors and start wildly laughing)

RP: My god, Syvil, you've been eaten up by a pair of pom-poms!

S: ...

WU: Oh wow. Syvil, I'm sooo sorry. I must have accidentally used your conditioner on Meri and left the one Doogé had given us to use on Meri, back in your bathroom.

S: (confused) You washed Meri in my bathroom? Why didn't you wash her in yours?

WU: Well, I was about to do that, but then I realized that the only soap I had would leave her smelling like a boy, so I figured it made sense to wash her in yours because, well, you know, you smell good all the time. (makes big smile)

S: ...

WU: I swear, it'll never happen again. (looks at watch) Oh, it's time to go. Everyone ready?

SM: Come on Syvil, I'll help you tame that fur.

S: (unamused) Whatever.

(two hours later, they're back from dinner and off the planet)

WU: Hey, how about flying through Zed?

S: NO.

WU: Come on, Syvil. We won't even touch down on the surface. We'll just fly around low, looking for zombies or whatever's there.

RP: Hmm. I am kind of curious to know what's on the planet.

SM: Me too. There's almost no documentation about Zed other than the zombie classification. Come on Syvil, let's do it!

(Syvil walks away)

WU: Do you think she's mad?

RP: Aww. Maybe we shouldn't do this.

SM: I didn't think she'd get mad over this. She loves exploring. Well, most of the time.

(Syvil reappears, fully suited up for an EVA)

WU: Syvil, we're not going down to the surface.

S: Oh, I know. But like E2 S79 of The Walking Dead, something could happen to the engines and we might have to make a crash landing on Zed.

(Wu-chan, Red, and Shoko run off to suit up)

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

01.45 am

Missed their gateway slot, stuck on Zed

The Black Flea had an 11:30 pm gateway slot. Instead of wormholing out, they ran into trouble staying afloat in the atmosphere of Zed. Forced to land, they're unsure about why they had trouble flying.

RP: (eyes wide open) Ohhhhh shiiiiiiiit.

WU: What happened?

SM: Not sure. It's definitely...

S: Engine trouble?

SM: Not engine trouble. Everything's green.

WU: Should I send a request for help?

Meri: Wuf!

SM: (with her index finger raised) Hold on for a minute and let me work this out. Red, the vertical thrust engines are reading near-zero G. What's Zed's G?

RP: Dunno. The available data is incomplete. I guess no one's bothered to come down and measure it?

SM: Shit. So Cap, the engines defaulted to the near-zero G of space. Even though Syvil was overriding vertical thrust, the computer's automated pilot system took back control when it thought we were stuck in the upper atmosphere, forcing us down.

Meri: (sad look) Wuf?

WU: So...

S: She's saying it'll be okay once we add the correct G-data to the computer.

WU: Uhm, okay then. So...

SM: Someone needs to go outside and take a measurement of the planet's G.

WU, RP, S: NOPE.

SM: Someone has to. We can't get an accurate measurement with the ship's partial G compensation. (pauses) Actually, there is a way. We just need to turn off all the power...

WU, RP, S: ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Meri: Wuf!

SM: Well, since I'm suited up, I'll go outside and take a reading.

RP: (sad) But, if they eat your brains, you'll be gone forever.

SM: No, no, no. I have a memory backup at BrainCopy. I mean, it won't be exactly me but it'll still be me.

(unexpectedly, three knocks on the exterior of the spaceship echo throughout the main quarters)

RP: Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shi...

WU: (grabs Red by the shoulders and shakes him) Red, get a hold of yourself, man! That was just some rocks hitting the side of the ship.

S: (scared witless) Are you for real? Those were not rocks.

WU: (either projecting calm confidence or ignorance) Oh Syvil, you watched too many episodes of The Walking Dead, I think.

(before Wu-chan could continue, four slower, harder knocks on the exterior of the spaceship)

S: (cowering behind her chair) Nani sore?!? Uso! Uso! Uso! That's not rocks!

Meri: (quietly) wuf?

(Wu-chan gets up and proceeds to walk out of the main quarters)

WU: Come with me Red.

RP: How about I just hang here?

WU: Red, we're going to investigate.

RP: Do we have to?

WU: HAI!

SM: I'm coming with.

S: No Wu-chan, wait. How about we just sit tight and wait for whatever's out there to get bored and walk away?

(as though on cue, five slow, louder knocks on the exterior of the spaceship)

WU: I'm sorry Syvil, but I don't think this is just going to go away. Why don't you take Meri with you to your quarters and lock the door?

Meri: Wuf?

S: No. I don't want to be alone if you're going to die, I mean, if you're all going to die, I mean...(heavy sigh) whatever we do, we do together, the crew of the Black Flea will always be one.

WU: (smiles back at Syvil, again, unclear if calm confidence or dumb ignorance) We're not going to die, Syvil.

(on their way to the cargo ramp — the only exit except for an emergency roof hatch — they gear up for war with a million zombies, or as many zombies that can be taken out with two guns, one rifle, a grenade launcher, four combat knives, and one Meri with laser eyes)

WU: Okay Red, you hang at the opposite side of me, and signal how many are out there from your view as I lower the ramp. Shoko, point the gun at whatever position Red points at. Syvil, hold onto Meri and you tell her what to shoot at. Now remember, don't shoot until I say so. I don't want any accidents. You got that, Red?

RP: Yep.

WU: Shoko?

SM: Ready.

WU: Syv...

S: Just lower the ramp already!

WU: Okay, here we go.

(pushing the button, it's not apparent if anything is outide as the ramp is fully extended)

WU: Huh. No one's there. Everyone hold.

(Wu-chan starts to walk down the ramp, when suddenly he freezes as a shadow starts running back to the ship)

Unknown: Huuuuuuu!

RP: Aaaaaaah!

S: Zombies!

WU: No wait!

(light reveals something in an EVA suit, hunched over, huffing and puffing, holding a tablet)

Unknown: (Holding the tablet screen up) Looking for this?

SM: (pleasantly surprised) The planet's G-data!

WU: How did you know?

Unknown: You know, you're not the first spaceship to make an unplanned landing.

WU: Oh.

Unknown: You know, what is it with you people anyway? Isn't a Zombie designation enough to keep you away? Didn't you folks watch S79 of The Walking Dead? You're not supposed to go to a planet classified as Zombie.

WU: What, that? But, that's just horror fiction. No one actually thinks zombies are real.

Unknown: Pffft. (conversation turns dark) Hey. You uh, you kids wanna see real zombies?

S, RP, SM: NO.

WU: Yes. Oh, I mean, no.

(Syvil walks over to Wu-chan and whacks him on the arm)

Unknown: Well then, take this data and get out of here immediately. Next time, you might not be so lucky. (winks at them as he turns around and walks away)

(ramp starts to close)

WU: We are definitely coming back!

Unknown: (turns around and shouts from a distance) What did I just tell you? DON'T COME ba....

(ramp closed and locked)

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

10:50 pm

Back to orbiting around Ukio

Having missed their gateway slot, Wu-chan has rebooked a new slot for Tuesday evening, giving them lots of free time before they can leave the Ulishia system.

WU: 21:30, tomorrow.

S: Once again, this is your fault.

WU: Is it, though?

SM, S, RP: YES.

Meri: WUF.

WU: Fine, but we learned quite a lot. We now have G-data on Zed and we have discovered that someone's living on Zed.

SM: None of which is useful.

WU: Sure it is. Next time we go down there, we won't be forced to land.

S: You are one baka Usagi.

WU: Hey, let's spend the morning exploring the shopping district in Tatamo!

S: (stern look) Warui, we haven't gone over the plans to sneak into Jageda Industries. We are doing it today. No more putting it off.

WU: Oh come on Syvil. We have lots of time! Live for the day — today!

S: A better tomorrow starts today.

SM: JP2 said, “The future starts today, not tomorrow.”

RP: Ooh, I got one! Tomorrow will be better than the next day!

WU: (walks over to Red and hugs him) Red, that was beautiful. Where did you get that from?

RP: (shrugs) It just popped into my head.

WU: (scratching Red's furry head) What a genius this Tanuki is! I'm going to write that down and use it as my ethos, Red. Such perfection.

S: Baka. That quote makes no sense. If tomorrow is better than the next day, then a year from now will be awful!

WU: (confidently walks over to Syvil and pats her on the back) Oh Syvil, my sweet but very wrong teddy bear, you are mistaken.

S: (squinty eyes filled with doubt) How so?

WU: Red, here, presents us a conundrum: If tomorrow will be better than the next day, why would we care about the next day? Clearly, tomorrow is better and by extension, today is even better. But, if we celebrate and embrace today, then, tomorrow cannot be better than today. Yet, if we celebrate and embrace tomorrow, the next day cannot be better than tomorrow, and so on. So, my dear teddy bear, we shall always take the present into account as the best day ever, so that every day that follows might live up to the label of being the best day ever!

RP: (nodding profusely with eyes wide open and grinning ear to ear) Yup, yup, yup!

S: (eyes glazed over)...

SM: (in shock)...

Meri: WUF!

S: Fine, but Shoko and I are not going out shopping. We're staying inside the Black Flea to review the plans ourselves.

WU: Okay, okay...how 'bout we finish watching the rest of S79 of The Walking Dead, have dinner, then go over the plans?

S: We're only on E5 S79 of The Walking Dead. We'll never finish it in time.

WU: There are only 8 episodes.

S: That's it?

WU: Yeah. The show has slowed way down since it peaked with 24 episodes back in the early years.

S: Fine.

WU: Yes!

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

11.59 pm

Still orbiting around Ukio

After three hours, Wu-chan and Syvil have finished S79 of The Walking Dead.

WU: Well now, that was dissatisfying. In no way is it possible for zombies to just break into a Hafu shell so quickly. I could fall a full floor on my head and my brain would be perfectly fine.

S: (looking straight at Wu-chan) Are you speaking from experience?

WU: What? No, I'm just saying...

S: That you think you can't crack your shell if you landed on your head from the second floor?

WU: You've seen Jageda's ads for the new shells. You can dent a shell with a sledgehammer but you can't crack it.

S: ...

WU: (knocks on head) This thing is harder than steel.

S: Agreed. You have a very hard head. Okay then, time to meet over the plans. (hits the intercom) We're ready. Meet in cargo.

WU: (not amused) We all have hard heads.

S: (looks casually back with a smirk) Yours is made of the densest material, though.

(Everyone, including Meri, assembles in the cargo. Syvil has pulled up the files from Doogé onto the screen.)

SM: Looks like we've got floor plans and diagrams of all the security layers. Oh, and look at that, there's the R&D lab for the prototype shells. Uhm. Hmm.

WU: What?

S: We have everything except details of how to break through each security layer. We know there are two dozen guards and the paths they take, but we don't know when and where they'll be at any given time.

SM: We have to get past the DOS-541 check-in, but no details about how.

RP: Oh boy. Is that right? Is there a failsafe sensor that locks down entire floors and floods them with gas?

WU: (eyes wide open) Whoa. That's cool.

S: No way. We can't do this, Warui.

SM: Yeah, this is too complicated to pull off, Wu-chan.

WU: Oh come on, Shoko. You're the daughter of a fusion engineer and a quantum phsyics engineer. You've built our very own quantum-time messaging device. I know you can find your way around just about any security system.

SM: Thanks for the confidence booster, but I'm still not qualified to break into all these systems.

RP: Didn't Doogé give us some tools to use? Let's go through that stuff first.

WU: (gleaming with joy at Red) Red, once again, you wonderful Tanuki!

S: (eyes rolling) Okay then. Let's see here. Night vision, magnetic boots, anti-gravity packs. Wait, Shoko what's this?

SM: (carefully examing a handful of items) Hmm. I think this one's an 8K-bit decrypter, this looks like a quantum disrupter, and I think this is a gamma ray visualizer.

WU: Yes! What do they do?

SM: They're tools that would help us break into Jageda, more or less.

WU: Cool!

S: Not cool.

WU: Why not?

S: You baka Usagi. No one should have tools like this, not even governments. None of these things are known to exist. Doogé is not all that he appears to be.

SM: I am inclined to agree with Syvil.

WU: Okay, okay. So, Doogé may not be exactly who he says he is. He's paying us a lot of money, though, and he just gave us a bunch of kick-ass tools.

S: Consequences, Warui.

WU: Pffft. Can we reasonably break in and get out without getting caught?

SM: Yes.

WU: Then there we go. We're on!

S: Warui, don't you have any sort of spidey-sense tingling right now?

WU: What? No. Look, if we never got into trouble, how boring would that be? Remember, tomorrow will be better than the next day, Syvil. We'll just blindly go where no one else has gone before!

S: (face palm)

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

11:58 pm

At the Ulishia gateway

To avoid last minute rushing and to keep the Black Flea out of missing another gatewy slot, Syvil has parked the ship at the gateway 2 hours ahead. Syvil has made the crew sit down and continue with its review of the plan to sneak into Jageda Industries.

S: Warui, what are you doing? Get back here.

WU: (looking through Doogé's cargo box labeled “cool stuff for you”) Shoko, do we have any of these remote micro explosives?

SM: No. How many are there?

WU: A couple dozen, I think. (pulling out some odd-looking glasses) What are these for, Shoko?

SM: They're multi-spectral augmented vision glasses. They can tell you if a person is a Hafu or Synther or Roboton, but it can't tell the difference between Synthers and Robotons. You can spot wireless signals, too. What else...

S: Warui, we need to buy a used microship.

WU: Why?

S: The Black Flea is too big to successfully cloak. We can cloak a microship and park it close-in

WU: Why can't we just rent one?

S: Hello? Do you want to be tracked?

WU: (sheepishly)...oh.

RP: Can we keep it? It'd be so much easier to use a microship to get around planets than to constantly fly the Black Flea.

WU: Ooh, I like that idea. Let's buy a new one, then.

S: (frustrated) No. We can save the money and make the necessary upgrades.

WU: (heavy sigh) Yeah, okay.

RP: Yeah! We getting a microship!

WU: (back to Doogé's cargo box, pulls out golf ball-looking objects) Shoko! Are these one of those anti-gravity remote probes?

SM: (glances over) Nope. Those are auto-targeting golf balls. Illegal as hell. You hit them and they automatically find their programmed target.

WU: (pulls out a baseball-sized object) Is this an anti-gravity remote probe?

SM: (glances back again) Nope. Those are programmable explosive baseballs.

WU: Geez. What does Doogé do for fun?

(The ship's phone buzzes. Doogé is calling the Black Flea)

S: He has ears on the ship, Warui.

WU: Hey Doogie, what up?

(Syvil makes a point to walk over to Wu-chan to whack him on the arm)

Doogé: It's Doogé. Glad to hear from you. What's your status?

WU: We're a couple of hours away from making our last hop to Earth. We, uh, had a slight delay. We took a trip to Zed and it delayed us a day.

Doogé: Ooh! Great planet. Did you compensate the vertical thrusters for Zed's G?

WU: Ha! Nope.

Doogé: Oh. Well, you're truly lucky! Those are real zombies down there, you know? I truly picked the right crew for the job!

S: Wait, what? Did you say there are real zombies?

Doogé: I did. We tried to use them for some experiments but, well, the virus and all. Too dangerous.

SM: Is it airborne?

Doogé: Indeed. You all wore your EVA suits, I hope, otherwise I'll have to cancel our contract.

S: Oh damn.

WU: Hey Dogo, is this stuff in the box for us to keep or are you loaning them to us?

Doogé: It's still Doogé. Cool stuff, right? They're yours to keep.

S: How did you get all this stuff? Half of it doesn't exist, at least not officially.

Doogé: I know, right? It's Back to the Future stuff, don't you think?

RP: Ooh. Who's Marty McFly? Oh I know, Cap, you're McFly!

WU: Wait, are there floaty skateboards in here somewhere?

Doogé: What? No. Did you not get my reference? Well anyway, I believe in you, Black Flea. Call you later!

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

11:41 pm

Parked in orbit around Mars

The Black Flea is prepping to sneak into Jageda Industries on Earth. They've parked at Mars on account that there is less government scrutiny of traffic orbiting Mars than Earth — a remnant effect of the Great War. Wu-chan is hyper-focused on finding a microship for the mission.

WU: Red, what do you think? This baby fits 6 and has four impulse engines. We can race in this.

RP: I dunno Cap. Looks good and all, but I think Syvil would not be happy with you spending so much money on that.

WU: Ehh. You're right. Ooh, how about this triple-engine three-seater? We can modify it and add a jump seat to fit four. Rear thrust ratio of 7.5 to 1!

RP: Cap, that one costs more than the previous one.

WU: But it's so powerful! We can add superchargers and no police could catch us!

RP: ...

WU: No, you're right, Syvil will definitely say no. Maybe Doogé will buy this for us?

S: (walking in, overheard Wu-chan) What the hell, Warui?!? We are not latching ourselves onto a benefactor. You were the one who convinced us that our freedom was worth more than anything than money could buy.

WU: Well yeah, I'm just saying, we'd have more freedom with this sweet monster.

S: Yeah? And who sits in the jump seat?

WU: Who's the smallest person? You, right?

RP: Cap, she's the pilot.

S: And Shoko monitors the scanners, trackers, and the airwaves. Red monitors the engines and weapons. Which means you're the one who should have to sit in a half-size jump seat, right?

WU: No you're right Red, this thing is way too expensive.

S: (walking away) Good decision, captain.

WU: (still poring through Galaxylist adverts) I see nothing.

RP: (looking over Wu-chan's shoulder) What about that one? Two engines, four seats, and it already has folding wings.

WU: Yeah, but it's butt ugly and three generations behind. It probably doesn't even have a space heater. Get it? Space heater.

RP: (faking laugh) Ha, ha. Good one, Cap. But it's dirt cheap and we can invest a lot into modding it for us.

WU: Three million miles on it. Are you crazy?

RP: We could immediately add two rebuilt top of the line engines, give it a paint job, and it'd look brand new and use it in a couple of days.

SM: (in passing while walking Meri, sees the Galaxylist post) Ooh, I always wanted one of these babies. Back before fusion engines, these microships were what started the shiplife trend. You could pull out the rear two seats and fit a toilet-shower combo and a mini kitchen.

WU: Red thinks we should get this and add two rebuilt engines.

SM: I like Red's idea.

WU: You always like Red's ideas.

SM: (blissfully smiling back) And your point is?

WU: ...

S: (walking past again) Warui! Are you still trying to find a microship? We have things to do, hurry up!

WU: Okay, okay. Geez. I guess we'll get this one. (hits the “buy now” button) Done.

SM: Cool! I'm making an official announcement, everyone. This is going to be my baby.

(and that, folks, is how The Black Flea became proud owners parents of The Baby Black Flea)

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

A folding wing VTOL-enabled microship registered as a CSD-class (Commercial Standard Delivery) unit. It's a second-hand unit that had previously been converted to a PUP-class (Personal Use Passenger) unit but was never re-registered as a PUP-class vehicle.

Procured by Warubozu Usagi through Galaxylist. Had 3 million miles on its odometer and showed some standard metal fatigue and wear.

While legally registered as a CSD class, it had been previously altered to a PUP. After acquisition, the crew of the Black Flea have made several modification: – Replaced all engines with newer, remanufactured fusion-impulse engines originally used in a CHF-class (Commercial Heavy Freight) ship, for extra power. – Put inline superchargers to give each engine an extra 10-second boost at full throttle. – Converted some space in the rear storage area to accommodate a cloaking device (slow type) and extra battery storage (120 kwh compared to the standard 80 kwh to run without the engines turned on. The battery is primarily used to power the cloaking device. – Added forward scanners disguised as front fog lights (the fog lights work). – Hidden rear- and front-firing 40mm guns with limited magazine capacity (20 shells max, each for a total of 80 shells). Once used up, they must be manually reloaded with new magazines.

Named the Baby Black Flea by Warubozu Usagi after Shoko claimed it as her baby project (to mod).

As with the original Black Flea, Warubozu Usagi chose a deceptive paint scheme to give it a police cruiser feel, though no police department uses such a tiny microship. However, because of the engine upgrades, the Baby Black Flea is significantly faster than police cruisers.

---

— The Warubozu Usagi

11.16 pm

The Black Flea remains parked on Mars, at Colony 0011

Before completing the purchase of the microship they found on Galaxylist, Wu-chan and Syvil decide to take a test flight from Colony 0011 to Colony 0108. On the way, they stopped at a site Wu-chan wanted to look at as a prospective homestead for the crew. On their way back, things did not go well.

(alarms going off)

WU: What's that?

S: Did I read the ship's manual? No. Did I have time to read the ship's manual? No. Do I look like I can read an entire 120 page ship's manual in five minutes? No...

WU: (interrupting) Yeah...got your point 10 minutes ago.

S: (pointing to the control panel in front) What's that blinking yellow thing?

WU: (looking closer) Check Engine light. Ooh, now it's flashing red.

(both engines cut off)

S: (!) Masaka?!?

WU: Can we make it back to 108?

S: Do I look like a flight engineer who has been operating on Mars for the last few years, and through all that experience, possess the capacity to properly judge the quality of the aerodynamics of this ship, the effect of wind and gravity, to give you an answer?

WU: Way more than me.

S: ...

WU: Okay, okay. Executive decision: We're staying on course to 11.

S: I think we're closer to 108, though.

WU: Well then, change of executive decision: We're headed back to 108.

(another alarm goes off)

S: Too late. We're landing now.

WU: What? Why?

S: We're stalling.

WU: Honto?

S: (focused on trying to land the microship) Hai.

WU: (looks Syvil in the eyes) Syvil, in these remaining moments we have left, I just want you to know that, well, I've always wanted you to be around me. I mean, I've always wanted to have Red and Shoko around me too. That's why I asked and begged the three of you to join me. I just, well, I mean, I really enjoy being around you the most. It's not just that I admire you and think you're the most amazing person I know. What I'm trying to say is that when I look at you, all I want to do is to give you...

S: We've landed.

WU: ...hug you and thank you for being an amazing pilot!!!

(Syvil could not get a signal on her phone despite swapping out her SIM. The networks on Mars are — still — sparse the further away you get from the colonies. It would take a full day of walking before they got a signal and called the Black Flea for help, and another 2 hours before the chronicles of Friday and Saturday could be transmitted and received.)

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— The Warubozu Usagi

Earth is too crowded, too expensive, too intrusive, and has too many rules!

Come join us on Mars at The Black Flea Station. We will have fewer rules, limits on the total population size, and we're very cheap. Best of all, no neighborhood HOAs. We are a colony of independent-minded folk, just like you. Our colony will have the highest level of privacy on Mars and we will never censor or ban you like the other colonies.

This is home. This is the future of The Black Flea Station.

Taking reservations for 1-acre plots now.

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— The Warubozu Usagi