The Warubozu Usagi

11:41 pm

Parked in orbit around Mars

The Black Flea is prepping to sneak into Jageda Industries on Earth. They've parked at Mars on account that there is less government scrutiny of traffic orbiting Mars than Earth — a remnant effect of the Great War. Wu-chan is hyper-focused on finding a microship for the mission.

WU: Red, what do you think? This baby fits 6 and has four impulse engines. We can race in this.

RP: I dunno Cap. Looks good and all, but I think Syvil would not be happy with you spending so much money on that.

WU: Ehh. You're right. Ooh, how about this triple-engine three-seater? We can modify it and add a jump seat to fit four. Rear thrust ratio of 7.5 to 1!

RP: Cap, that one costs more than the previous one.

WU: But it's so powerful! We can add superchargers and no police could catch us!

RP: ...

WU: No, you're right, Syvil will definitely say no. Maybe Doogé will buy this for us?

S: (walking in, overheard Wu-chan) What the hell, Warui?!? We are not latching ourselves onto a benefactor. You were the one who convinced us that our freedom was worth more than anything than money could buy.

WU: Well yeah, I'm just saying, we'd have more freedom with this sweet monster.

S: Yeah? And who sits in the jump seat?

WU: Who's the smallest person? You, right?

RP: Cap, she's the pilot.

S: And Shoko monitors the scanners, trackers, and the airwaves. Red monitors the engines and weapons. Which means you're the one who should have to sit in a half-size jump seat, right?

WU: No you're right Red, this thing is way too expensive.

S: (walking away) Good decision, captain.

WU: (still poring through Galaxylist adverts) I see nothing.

RP: (looking over Wu-chan's shoulder) What about that one? Two engines, four seats, and it already has folding wings.

WU: Yeah, but it's butt ugly and three generations behind. It probably doesn't even have a space heater. Get it? Space heater.

RP: (faking laugh) Ha, ha. Good one, Cap. But it's dirt cheap and we can invest a lot into modding it for us.

WU: Three million miles on it. Are you crazy?

RP: We could immediately add two rebuilt top of the line engines, give it a paint job, and it'd look brand new and use it in a couple of days.

SM: (in passing while walking Meri, sees the Galaxylist post) Ooh, I always wanted one of these babies. Back before fusion engines, these microships were what started the shiplife trend. You could pull out the rear two seats and fit a toilet-shower combo and a mini kitchen.

WU: Red thinks we should get this and add two rebuilt engines.

SM: I like Red's idea.

WU: You always like Red's ideas.

SM: (blissfully smiling back) And your point is?

WU: ...

S: (walking past again) Warui! Are you still trying to find a microship? We have things to do, hurry up!

WU: Okay, okay. Geez. I guess we'll get this one. (hits the “buy now” button) Done.

SM: Cool! I'm making an official announcement, everyone. This is going to be my baby.

(and that, folks, is how The Black Flea became proud owners parents of The Baby Black Flea)

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— The Warubozu Usagi