Monday, January 23, 2096

6:30 pm

Still in Shirakawa-go, Gifu Prefecture, Japan

Having failed to learn their lesson at Lake Motosu, the Black Flea crew once again chose a campground in Gokayama in the middle of winter. Partly because of this, the crew decided that the historic, heritage villages in and around Gokyama were less to their liking than Shirakawa-go. They decided to return to Shirakawa-go.

SM: Are you sure you want to keep a place in Shirakawa-go?

WU: I already signed a contract.

S: (glaring at Wu-chan) You did what?

WU: We all agreed this would be an ideal place to live, didn't we?

RP: Yeah! Meri, you're going to love living on a farm!

Meri: Wuf!

S: I thought we were going to discuss this more, after dinner?

WU: Oh Syvil, I know us too well. We'll talk about it then talk about it some more. Before you know it, we'll have talked ourselves out of it.

RM: That's our thing, though. We don't make rash decisions.

S: Warui!

WU: You guys want to go see it now?

S: Warui!

WU: I found a spot just on the edge of the village so that it doesn't need to adhere to the historical requirements of building a gassho house.

S: Warui!

WU: It has a nearly uninterrupted view into the valley and on the back side, a forest full of Hinoki!

S: Warui!

WU: Meri, you're going to love it! So much room to run and hunt for buta.

Meri: Wuf?

S: Warui!

WU: Wild boar.

Meri: (freaked out) Wwwuf?

S: Warui!

WU: Oh don't worry, just use your laser eyes on them. You're going to love roasted boar!

S: Warui!

WU: Yes Syvil?

S: How much did you spend?

WU: Well, that's the thing. It didn't cost much at all.

S: How much?

WU: Fifteen million yen. That's not even a fifth of what Doogé deposited in our account just to listen to him talk about doing the Jageda job.

S: (intense glaring) Warui!

WU: Yes?

S: Baka! This means the property is haunted!

Meri: (freaked) Wuuuf?!?

RP: Aww shoot.

SM: Ewww.

WU: (taken aback) What? No way. I read the contract and it didn't say anything about being haunted.

S: Since when did you learn to read Japanese?

WU: I just use my automated translation app to read it. It didn't say anything about ghosts.

S: Let me see that contract.

Wu-chan pulls the contract up on his tablet as Syvil starts looking it over.

S: (pointing at the contract) ...

WU: What? Yurei. I looked it up and it's something about oil? No big deal. We can dig it up and do some soil remediation by...

S: (back to glaring at Wu-chan) Baka! It's not “yurei”. It's “yūrei”!

WU: (confused look) Wait, so not oil?

Syvil types in “yūrei” into Wu-chan's tablet

WU: (suddenly deflated) Oh. Oh shit.

S: Everyone, congratulate Warui here for buying us a haunted house!

— The Warubozu Usagi